Welcome to TMP's trying to conceive, pregnancy & parenting forums!
TTC & Pregnancy Tools: Ovulation Calculator | hCG Calculator | Due Date Calculator
The TMP Store

Preconception, Pregnancy, Parenting & You

Go Back   The Mommy Playbook > TTC - Trying To Conceive Forums > Trying to Conceive After Loss > Trying Again: Our Journals

mandalynn's TTCAL Journal - Trying Again: Our Journals

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old February 16th, 2012, 03:50 PM   #9
mandalynn

 
mandalynn's Avatar

Member #: 16825
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 1,312
Well, it's getting close to testing time!

Honestly I've been super laid back this cycle. I didn't end up temping or using OPK's at all. I checked CM sort of. I really only mentally noted any CM that was obvious (like showing up on TP) I think our BD schedule was ok. I don't really know. It's been more of a NTNP month for us. Honestly, I feel like I might be pregnant though. I'm having a lot of similar symptoms to what I've experienced my previous BFP cycles. My boobs feel bigger and a bit sore. My nipples look different. I feel bloated and just have this sort of full feeling in my lower abdomen. I've been SO hungry I could eat all the time. These could all be IPS ofcourse. But I won't be incredibly shocked or surprised if I get a BFP this month.

I'm just trying to decide when I want to test. DH and I are going out of town this weekend for a much needed mini vacay. I've been going back and forth between testing tommorow before we leave or waiting untill Monday when we get back. If I test tommorow and it's negative then I could drink on our vacay. But also I don't want to start our weekend get away with disapointment or stress and worry and concern. Even if it's a BFP I'll be excited, but I'll be more scared than anything else. I'd like to put the worry off for a bit longer.

Also, I've spent my week in bed with a killer cold. I don't really think that has anything to do with the pregnancy stuff because the symtoms I'm feeling are unrelated to my stuffy nose and all that. But you know, it could be throwing my perception of what going on with my body off. Overall I've just been feeling really crappy! I feel a little better today. I'm really hoping this cold is much better by the morning so I can really enjoy my weekend!


__________________

mandalynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Please register or login to remove these ads.

Old February 29th, 2012, 03:04 AM   #10
mandalynn

 
mandalynn's Avatar

Member #: 16825
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 1,312
I don't have much of an update for recently. I just want to be a momma But I also really want to be in a good emotional place. Lately that's been a bit of a struggle. I feel kind of silly taking a break from TTC right now because we really haven't been trying that long. But I know DH really needs a break. I also know I feel very anxious and tense and stressed out about TTC which is not going to do us any favors. In fact, it's probably pretty detrimental. So I'm working on that. I'm reading a book on emotional freedom. I'm also trying to set some time aside for meditation. I found some affirmations for fertility so I'm going to start working with those, imagining that my body knows just what to do to create a healthy baby. I think finding some level of emotional peace is my top priority right now. It's a journey though. I know it will always be a struggle.

I know I've been MIA a lot recently, but I just want you all know how much I appreciate your continued support. You ladies are ALWAYS in my thoughts and prayers. I am totally cheering all of you on! I can't wait to see some beautiful BFP's in the comming weeks!!!


__________________

mandalynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old May 10th, 2012, 01:22 AM   #11
mandalynn

 
mandalynn's Avatar

Member #: 16825
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 1,312
I am so anxious to test!! This is the hardest part of the cycle for me. I think I'm around 6DPO, so still VERY early. The past couple of days I've had two symptoms that are so overwhelming I can't help but notice them, though!! I am tired and hungry ALL. THE. TIME.

Seriously, all I want to do is sleep and eat.

I definitely remember this from my BFP cycles, but I don't remember how early I noticed it. I think it was quite early. Probably around 7DPO. So that makes me hopeful! I hope it's not IPS. The hungry could be just my imagination, but the sleepy definitely feels weird for me. I guess only time will tell. We only got one BD around O. It's so hard to time it right because DH and I's schedules are super opposite. But at least we got that one time. That's all we needed on previous BFP cycles so hopefully one strategically timed BD will be enough this time too!

And if it is, hopefully this one STICKS!!


__________________

mandalynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old May 13th, 2012, 03:14 AM   #12
mandalynn

 
mandalynn's Avatar

Member #: 16825
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 1,312
Well I'm feeling pretty bummed about Mother's Day. I work at a restaurant as a bartender/server. It will be VERY busy, which is fine.... but every year, from almost every group of people I serve I get asked if I'm a mother myself. Years past it hasn't been too hard to just say no, but this year.... hearing that question over and over again.... ugh. I just really don't want to hear it at all. And it sucks because I know people ask out of kindness because they want to wish me a happy mother's day if I have kids myself. But it's just hard to hear. Especially now. Especially THIS month, when I should have been huge and due in like 2 weeks and probably not working at all because I would be at home getting ready for my baby.

Man. I'm depressing myself just typing this out. Deep breaths and happy thoughts. That will get me through.

One more rant though. An ex co-worker came in tonight and was visiting with everyone, wishing the mommas at my work a happy mother's day. She asked me when I was going to have kids and I brushed it off saying something like "I'm not sure. Sometime soonish" She continued on saying "Well you would be a great mom, and you know it's about time for you, you should really start thinking about it" She was sort of saying this stuff teasingly, but it really made me want to say "Well I agree. I agree so much that my husband and I started trying, and I got pregnant, and I should be having a baby this month. But instead I had a miscariage. So you don't need to tell me about when I should be having babies because I should be having a baby now."

But ofcourse I didn't say that because that would just bring everyone down.


__________________

mandalynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Tags
amanda's, journal:, racing, recovering
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Forum Jump


   

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:24 PM.