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Breastfeeding stigma - June 2013 Playgroup

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Old July 5th, 2014, 01:21 PM   #1
WhiteWolfe

 
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Breastfeeding stigma

Holy cow. I went on the Baby Bump app to see if there are any threads about OPKs while nursing. One thread was from a mom who has been trying to get pregnant and is currently nursing her 22 month old baby.

Like 30 girls commented to ask why she is still breastfeeding and that she should have stopped when her baby turned 1!!!!! I am totally floored at how many people agreed that babies should be weaned at 1. It astounds me that so many new moms are that uneducated!

I'm totally fine with weaning your baby whenever you see fit. But I'm shocked that so many moms were appalled that she hadn't weaned yet. OMG!!!

I wanted to comment but the thread was closed. So I came here


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Old July 5th, 2014, 02:14 PM   #2
tiffnyloo


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Ugh! Lame. I've heard some of the other forums like the bump and babycenter are really unsupportive. I love TMP! It is the best.

Each baby is different! There is no magical fairy that comes the night of your baby's birthday and says, "poof! here's a magic spell you no longer need your favorite form of comfort from your mother."

I agree that weaning is very personal and there's nothing wrong with weaning when mom feels it is time. There are many reasons to wean, but I don't think the calendar is a reason to wean. There are also reasons not to wean. There are plenty of gentle ways to wean, I just hate it when people say there's something wrong with not weaning. We should always listen to our baby more than other people and if baby doesn't get upset about cutting out feedings, then awesome. He/she is ready. Not every baby will walk at the same time, not every baby is ready to let go of nursing at the same time and each developmental milestone is separate, e.g. a walking baby can still need to nurse.

Rant over!


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Old July 6th, 2014, 12:20 AM   #3
Altrix
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Poor woman, wish it was possible at times like that to give them a referral to TMP . Every baby and mom is different, and just because babies *need* BM or formula to 1yr doesn't mean you have to stop at the magical year mark. Plus that's totally not what she wanted advice about!

My MIL just today asked if L was still nursing, and I said yes. But she only really gets happy when she hears how 'few times a day now' she's down to, if that makes sense. As if the goal is weaning. But she's pretty much been like that since 4 or 5m. She also remarked as to how she's, "surprised I have any milk still" (which shows she doesn't really understand the processes involved with extended BFing -which is fine, but fact nonetheless)

Can't wait to see the look on her face in a few months when she finds out I was still nursing L while growing a new one I think telling her I'm still nursing is the only thing keeping her from investigating whether I'm pregnant each time she visits

Then there's the other family member who told L she, "didn't need that" anymore (referring to nursing obv) right to her face at 18m. Excuse me, you don't get to influence my child like that even if she doesn't understand, because really it's you who doesn't understand.

Ok rant over, got sidetracked. Sorry. Is this even in the BFing forum? I didn't actually look since I'm on the app

Sent from my iPhone using TMP Forums

Eta: lol I see it's not in the BFing forum, sry to jump in!


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Old July 6th, 2014, 12:25 AM   #4
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Not the BFing forum, but you are welcome to post here. It's dead city. I can't believe your family especially saying that to your daughter. People are real jerks sometimes.


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Old July 6th, 2014, 01:11 AM   #5
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Jump in any time! Especially to join us in our rants!! Lol

I just find it shocking how many women who have actually birthed children don't understand the logic behind breastfeeding. As a new mom I try to learn as much as I can about all facets of parenting. I know the knowledge on it has changed a lot over the years so maybe I'm being too hard on the older generations. But other new moms totally bashing someone for breastfeeding a child past 12 months is just absurd to me!

I'm so glad I spent my time on TMP when I had issues come up because all I've gotten here was support. That's exactly what I needed! Had I been on another forum I may have had an even harder time.


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Old July 6th, 2014, 08:34 AM   #6
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I can't believe how many people make judgements about breastfeeding when they really don't know.
Just the other day I had a family member, who is a nurse, ask me when I was going to wean. She said I needed to start either cows milk or formula. Huh?! When I told her I was going to go with the flow and let Lo take the lead, she made some comment about him not eating real food well. Um, exactly! By still breastfeeding him I know he is getting the nutrients he needs even if he won't eat solids.


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Old July 6th, 2014, 09:48 AM   #7
tiffnyloo


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Quote:
Originally Posted by Meg626 View Post
I can't believe how many people make judgements about breastfeeding when they really don't know.
Just the other day I had a family member, who is a nurse, ask me when I was going to wean. She said I needed to start either cows milk or formula. Huh?! When I told her I was going to go with the flow and let Lo take the lead, she made some comment about him not eating real food well. Um, exactly! By still breastfeeding him I know he is getting the nutrients he needs even if he won't eat solids.
A nurse?! Mannnnn that disappoints me, but it's not like medical professionals go through the same courses as lactation consultants, so I have a little understanding on the one hand, but on the other hand it blows me away.

I have read so much about how cutting out nursing or reducing nursing in no way helps a picky eater suddenly eat more. Stay strong mama, you are doing the right thing Meghan!


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Old July 6th, 2014, 10:03 AM   #8
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In the comments from the other forum some of the moms were saying that at 12 months you need to wean from the breast and start cow's milk or formula and supplements.

I was thinking... Why on earth would anyone see that as logical? Supplements are usually needed when something is lacking. Would you tell your child that when they reach a certain age they no longer need to eat vegetables because they can just take vitamins to get the right nutrients? If you can get the full nutrition from the most pure and natural source... Why would you insist that artificial forms are better? I just don't get it. Makes no sense to me.

Again - totally fine with weaning at any age the mother (or baby) chooses but this idea that it is healthier to feed formula and supplements at a certain age instead of pure natural breastmilk is just so weird.


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